The One and Lonely Extrovert

It's 10:30, I've done my laundry, then relaxed, and got ready for bed. My big exam was tomorrow for a class I utterly despised, but I knew that I was at least going to get enough sleep before the early alarm clock goes off....

... Then suddenly one of my roommates comes in the apartment with her boyfriend, the other roommates join in on their fun and begin chitchatting, and there is laughing and silly movies being played.... Without me, on that ONE night I had to go to bed early...

Besides the fact that that was annoying because it woke me up, it also made me feel uninvited. Don't get me wrong, people are allowed to have fun in groups without me, but when it's in a space that's also mine when I'm trying to sleep, as you can understand, it can be pretty upsetting.

Typically extroverts have this general need to either be socially stimulated, or to not miss out on what others are doing, whereas introverts need their quiet or alone time to process their thoughts. Even though my personality type has the mildest form of "extrovertedness", I still can get pretty lonely pretty easily! It's a nasty feeling, but thankfully with my group of friends, I've been learning to deal with it alright.

Being the only extrovert in my apartment can really suck sometimes, to say the least. I'll wanna party at times when my roommates wanna chill, and sometimes they'll do fun things when I'm not even there. They're not doing this "on purpose", it's just the way they are. Because of this I have learned a lot about what makes them unique, and also what's cool about my personality type, and the beauty between our inner differences.


Sometimes, because I'm the "odd-one-out" in our group, the other three can connect in an intuitive and psychological level that I simply cannot. Later in life I'm going to deal with people who can't relate to me, who DON'T want to hang out with me, who need me to NOT be around, and I'm going to have to give them their space, whether that's what I want or not. It's a good lesson to learn, even if it's a hard and sometimes lonely one. I will say, the good times with my introverted buddies outweigh the sometimes-tough-times, and I couldn't have asked for a better situation.

They may never understand me fully, and that's ok. People are going to be different, vastly different, and sometimes it's really not so bad being the "odd-one-out". Sometimes that just means you're the special one. If you frequently feel friction just because of differences between you and others, or you get lonely often, or you just feel you don't belong, hang in there. And if you introverts out there have wee had to deal with an annoying lot of extroverts, I feel you. The toughest moments in life are always the ones that make us better in the long run.



One other thing I also learned from them? Is that I need to get me some more extroverted friends, FAST!!! Before I go CRAZYYYY!!!!!!




Peace out everyone!


Bethany

Why Spiritual Experiences Can Ruin You

Spiritual experiences can confuse us greatly. No, spiritual experiences are not a bad thing. Heck, they're really, really, REALLY frikkin' awesome. It is a HUGE blessing and has an addicting effect on souls, and can change any life forever. Soooo then... why is it we go on retreats, start speaking in tongues, prophesying, gettin' drunk in the Spirit, then we go home and life isn't very exciting anymore? Where have the spiritual fireworks gone? Why does our spiritual life feel so... boring again?

Perhaps because we rely too much on our senses than we think.


When we feel God's presence, it's super easy to believe in Him, right? When we have the proof right in front of us, God feels so much more real to us. That's human nature. However, to really prove that you're serious about following God, He wants you to prove it by going beyond your natural human borders and discover the deeper side of love, despite the fact that you might not "sense" Him there all the time.


I heard this true story once of a formerly Catholic woman telling someone about her leaving the church because she felt like she wasn't getting anything out of it. The man then responds by saying, "Let me get this straight... You're saying that you've been consuming the literal body and blood of Christ, listening to the entire Bible plus teachings of it for years, and receiving absolution, and you haven't been getting anything out of it?"

This lady is a prime example of how the human heart can become obsessed with the stimuli of the senses. If all we really need is a spiritual experience, we can go to a Buddhist temple and be totally satisfied after that. Our reliance on experiences is what's caused all those "wars"and is why the body of Christ keeps splitting up, it is certainly not because of religion itself. It's just like our general idea of love, how gooshy feelings, soulmates, and making out and "woohooing" our weekends means romance. Or  even more commonly how in movies we know that two characters are in love because of that big kiss scene.

This is why divorce rates are so high, especially among Christians, because we worship our feelings, not the actual God Himself, which is love. Love isn't an emotion, it's an action that we choose. Love is when we choose not to yell foul words or accusations at someone, even though they've wronged us. Love is forgiving and forgetting. Love is cleaning up after the other person even when you're worn out from work. Love is laying down your life for your friends. Again, love is NOT based on feelings!!! In fact, oftentimes, true acts of love are done when the other person doesn't even want to do it.  

That is what makes the Eucharist so wonderful. It looks like a wafer, it tastes like a wafer, but we know in our hearts and minds that it is the body of Christ. There's more "magic" and power in that than any sort of feeling we may find, because we are denying ourselves and letting Jesus in physically. We may not fall to the ground crying from it, but despite that we just know that it's really truly Him. This is what faith is all about. 

Now let me say this again, spiritual highs are really sweet, and this isn't to say you won't or that you're not supposed to get "high" from taking communion, I'm just saying that love and faith is beyond us. And there is no doubt in that at all. 

The Real Reason Why Jack Frost is so Awesome!!!

Why Jack Frost from Rise of the Guardians is Awesome

I saw ads on the side of my facebook advertising Rise of the Guardians. By looking at the pictures, the concept art, and the way that they had presented the movie, I thought it was going to be some sort of fantasy movie that took place in an icy forest, with a rather handsome main character, a talking magical bunny, a tree fairy, a wise old wizard, and some golden cloud guy who floats around. They deal with the perils of the forest at nighttime, when this dark evil force comes forth, and they protect the innocent creatures of their home as best they can.  

Boy I was wrong.

I go and see the movie with my little brother, and my idea of it was WAAAAAAAAAAAY off. Nevertheless, I left the theater feeling pleasantly surprised at how good it was. At first I wasn’t sure why. When it came out on home video, I saw it again and finally realized what it was that I liked about it. It was Jack. 

This is NOT a fan-girl post. It isn’t even really a “fan” post. Thought I’d say that. 

Jack Frost from Rise of the Guardians is a stunning character. It doesn’t take much character creation analysis to see that this character was purposefully created to appeal to a very wide spectrum of people, to be marketable. Although 80% of what makes the character likeable is completely shallow, there are some “subliminals” to him that I have come to notice the more I observed him.

So here are the four reasons why Jack Frost was created:

First, and the most obvious, is because of his dashingly good looks. Perfect smile, narrowing eyes, boy-band hair, skinny pants, hoodie... Doesn’t help that Chris Pine voices him, either. *sighs* 

OK, you get the idea. This is to grab the female’s attention, and young and old, are automatically captivated by his icy design. While I, regrettably, admit that I have a cartoon-crush on him, this is clearly a powerful marketing ploy, because statistically females spend more money than males do. The more females at the theater, the more money made in the box office. This is the number one reason why Jack Frost is on the silver screen. Typical mega corp behavior... 

Dreamworks poop. 

Ok fellow dudes, you can stop rolling your eyes now. 

Secondly, and on a relatable level, Jack is on a quest to find out who he is, what his purpose is on earth, and just why he was chosen to do something he didn’t think he could do. We all wanna know who we are, what we are, when we are to be us, and most importantly why... Why are we here? Why does God wanna use us? Why, and will I ever know, am I... me??? And how am I supposed to be me in this world? What is the point of it all? Teens are always struggling with this, as they (ahem, we) are budding adults. Everyone can relate to this.

Thirdly, on an even deeper note, Mr. Frost has a longing for a family, a love for children, and a desire to just make children happy. Jack is a very fatherly figure. Ladies, stop imagining what you and his kids would look like, and pay attention. 

He has a very real and natural longing to serve children (the new generation) and bring them into a life of fun, or “spiritual” joy, if you will.

He is self-sacrificial, risks his life to save others, and is a hero that children can look up to, both in real life and in Guardian land. Everyone admires a superhero character, and one with a familiarity (a somewhat nostalgic feeling) of wanting to be with children.

Fourthly, he gets tempted. This is where the half-unintended-by-the-designer-but-not-by-God part comes in. 

Pitch hates children. He doesn’t target the adults, he targets the kids. Why? Because they represent the faithful ones. Pitch is all about fear. In reality, Satan isn’t necessarily about brutally tearing you to pieces as painfully as possible, despite what all the horror movies want you to think (that’s what Hell is for). He’s more interested in the littler, more subtler things that “sneak into” your weakest moments (when the kids are asleep, for example) which can eventually lead you into a greater catastrophe. But where does all the real-life violence, money-pooling, conspiracies, and lustful mindsets come from? 

“Why tempt a man into adultery when gluttony is enough to send him to hell?” -The Screwtape Letters

Every sin we commit is fueled by fear. Think about it. The fear of what the others might think if you don’t do it. The fear of getting caught. The fear of remaining never being loved. The fear of never experiencing a romance. The fear of being defeated. The fear of messing up big time. The fear of pain. Even the fear of our own selves. It’s a very personal and very real darkness contained within our own souls. 

Back to you, Jack.

Yay!

Jack doesn’t even realize that being a guardian (which is, his destiny, his calling), trusting this mysterious powerful force that has chosen him, even though he has been “silent” to Jack all these years, will lead him to his center. Pitch wants Jack’s center to be of fear. This is when the power of the encouragement of fellowship comes in.

I am now going to put the basic plot of the movie into a strictly Christian perspective.

In the intro to the movie, Jack is risen from the dead, is given a second chance, and new life. He is new to being “born again”, and he doesn’t understand what his new life is all about. Then, without warning, this unknown force intrudes on his life and turns it all around. Through this, North, Tooth, Bunnymund, and Sandman all teach Jack very different but essential lessons about true identity through faith. 

North responds to the call to evangelize to Jack, which is what invites him into the discipleship and challenges him to seek out truth over all things in a completely different way.

 Bunnymund is all about new beginnings, which is where new life in Christ starts, and also points to the joy of Jesus’ resurrection. 

Tooth tries to comfort and listen to Jack when he is at his lowest. She also reminds him that even though he was never guaranteed an easy journey in the faith, it was undoubtedly the most joyful one, and it truly made a difference in the world. 

And finally, the most loving sacrifice, Sandman lays down his life for his friends. 

The power of “four” (or more), and using our own spiritual gifts to built a culture of love is oddly very evident in this movie!  

And what does all this come down to?

Faith like a child. It’s like when the little boy says right to the face of darkness:

“I believe in you, I’m just not afraid of you.”

In our culture of fear, we are learning not to believe in the existence of Hell and devils. We must must MUST believe in fear, but by all means, we must mist MUST not be afraid of it! The little boy is also an amazing example of how the true Christian faith really looks. I am thus encouraged in my faith journey, and I really hope you are too, or at least have an idea of how to look through new eyes to see Jesus’ perspective, or messages in everyday objects. 

Now I guess I can say that seeing ROTG was well worth my $7.50. 

Bye bye babies!!!!

Muah

Quitting? ME??? Nevah!

I highly doubt that anyone is going to reply to my WordPress post. I mean, why should they?

Don't worry, I'm not going to get all depresso on ya with why that is.

So uh, heh, *blushes* guys? About that last post.... NO NO no, not the WordPress one, the OTHER one! I was eh, just kidding! Eh heh heh... ahem....

I just wanted to point out something: My posts have been too serious lately. I've been flippin' through all my older posts from last year, since I was a pretty active blogger throughout 2012, and something occurred to me: Those posts stay more true to my characteristics than my current ones do.

I am a joyful human being. I am optimistic. Outgoing. Sometimes goofy. A sanguine. That's just me.

I kinda want those old posts back, now. I mean, quitting?? What was I even thinking?

To sympathize with myself, I did have someone die, I did move out on my own for the first time, and I did forgo some intense realizations, life lessons, and inner changes over a very short period of time. Yes, that was very rough, but I'm still alive!

I can now still be who I was born to be, but something is different from me now than before: maturity. I also have a much stronger passion to defend what I believe in and stand for. If someone, anyone, offends that, I can get pretty defensive. I am loyal, persistent, and I don't like to quit. That's why I was surprised at myself to even read that post I had written about quitting. Poo.

I can take my suffering and learn from it. I can grow with it. I have changed. A lot. But I am still the same ol' cheery Bethany somehow. I turned 19 yesterday. My 18th year is officially over. The end of that chapter was hard, again, I can sympathize, but that's all over and done with. Now it's ADVENTURE TIME! *Raises Crystal Sword* Thanks, God. You da bestest!

So even though I have fallen, I am back up now, and not giving up.

Yeah dats cliche. But many never even learn that. 

Peace out, Honey Babes!!!

WordPress HALP??

I'm not very good at giving up.

So here I am, ladies and germs!!!!! So why am I back? Well, I had done some research on what blog engines are the best/favorite of le internets, and what I got was WordPress with a HUGE lead at number one, and Tumblr at two. Blogger was probably three, but it was closely matched with a few other blogs. Anyway, so I immediately began looking into WordPress, and it's EVERYWHERE! It's not just a blog site, it's a website maker! And it's free! You can also sync other blogs onto it, so I could include all of these posts onto my WordPress. Sounds perfect! So I began downloading it, right? It even guarantees a simple 5-step setup process.

I don't know what I'm doing wrong. It's too difficult. And I've hacked Mac-related things before.


DOES ANYONE IN THIS INTERNET WORLD KNOW HOW TO DOWNLOAD WORDPRESS ONTO A MAC???? I'VE LOOKED AT TUTORIALS AND THEY DON'T HELP!!!


Thanks.

Quitting

*Sigh*

Well, yet again I have lost hope in this blog.

OK, not really, but being the extravert that I am I need the encouragement (aka views and comments) to continue, and quite frankly lately I haven't really been getting any. Honestly it's upsetting. I wanted to draw in people from outside my friend's circle and provide honest posts with encouragement. At the beginning of the year that's been happening, but strangely lately it hasn't (I blame Tumblr). Currently I have little hopes for spreading good words to a crowd through Blogger, and I've tried to, but it's not working.

I'd be lying if I said that this blog hasn't caused me grief. Expressing my views despite what my friends thought was something that I knew I could do, but I'm in the wrong place for it. I would look at my friend's blogs, and other blog writers and see how well they are doing, and I suppose that was my driving force at continuing my blog, was making other people happy. However, I knew people weren't reading it much, but I wrote anyway. I wrote and wrote and wrote... Still, I rarely got comments or views. Oh, I'm going to keep writing, but perhaps in a more private way, via journal, AND in my own website, probably Weebly.

So there you have it. This may not be goodbye forever, but it is for now.

Not that anyone's going to see this anyway.

Not being pessimistic, and at least I can say I've tried.

See you later, strangers.

Sorrow

"I’m not as okay as I like to say 
and this pain is more than they know, 
more than I show."

- Amber Hunter, This Pain 


She was funny, carefree, and wonderful in many ways. I remember walking away from her often wearing a big smile. Sure she wasn't my mom or dad, or a sibling or a best friend, but she still meant a lot to me. 

This week my favorite teacher passed away. She will be thoroughly missed.

However, this post is not a dedication to her. It is a reflection of my own heart. 

As a result of this, old worries have infected me, old sinful habits have been revisited, and pain has been bottled up. I've taken some comfort from listening to music, but it can only distract me for so long. I've been withdrawing myself from family, friends, and classmates, and wasting time in my room for many hours at a time without leaving. I didn't think for a while to call upon the Lord for help. 

After a big fall, I finally did it. I asked God for help. 

I can't tell you the difference it made in my heart. It was a strange but tender sweetness that I have never felt before.

In silent suffering, mourning, stress, and anxiety, that's where God's mercy and love can be felt the strongest. At first, especially when talking about the saints and stuff, I didn't think that their way of suffering would in any way bring me personally closer to Christ. I didn't understand why the joyful can, at times, feel more disconnected to God's sweetness than the ones who weren't. Oh, God is near at all times, people! But sorrow brings forth such a beautiful longing in us that allows us to fully experience God's peace, care, comfort, and unending love. I never thought I would get to feel that. I know that someday it'll happen to me again, maybe perhaps excruciation, but at least I can look forward to the way my spirit feels now, only better. 

Thanks, God. You really are good.

If someone you know is grieving, here is another article that you may find helpful:, so don't worry, we're in this together. 

Our Hero Setting

Ever notice how many stories are created that involve one person rebelling against the opposing world, thus eventually shifting into some sort of illustrious champion? First they have to do something, anything, to grab the attention of the high-held power figure in order to raise awareness for some good cause. Then one by one they win over the hearts of the masses, drawing them together as a team, and ultimately destroying the evil force, sometimes with "true" love and peace, and so on and so forth. The Hunger Games, Mylo Xyloto, the Dark Knight trilogy, and even MLPFIM are a few modern examples that carry such themes.

If you're like me, you can't get enough of those action packed tales of bravery and justice. You like having someone to edge-on, to get angry at, to cry with, to encourage, to grow with, and even to fall in love with. Even though this character is fiction and cannot actually hear you when you screaming at your book or tv, he/she still creates something in us that feels real.

Jesus was like that. Like the rest of the stories he was just an ordinary guy who was destined to revolt the ways of the world, knowing that he would get love and support from his fans, and then executed by his own people. Jesus says we need to be like him.

We look at other characters such as Harry Potter, Thor, Finn, and Lara Croft and think, man, do I wish I could do what they can do. If anything, these characters are completely unrealistic. What fiction stories tend to get right is how terrible the world is. No, we all haven't become mindless robots serving a big fat man who electrocutes us every time we say something he doesn't like, but we do have a complex system that tries to shut down our morals, blot out truth, and make our selfish desires seem like the right thing to do. If we, the ordinary human beings, choose to take a stand against such foolishness, we are not likely to succeed by having everyone cheering for us. We could inspire people by the thousands, we could influence many to turn away, we could take over the world with smiles and unicorns. Quite the contrary, it is likely that people will hate you, tear you down, and do horrible things to you. It could happen. Persecution is to be expected, after all. This is why everyone is so scared to fight, because of what everyone else might think, say, or do that could hurt them. But please, ladies and germs:

What are you so scared of?

Are people really all that intimidating? Is this going to matter a week from now? Is God's protection just not good enough?

No. No. No.

Whatever it will look like for you to be a hero? Well, that's for God to decide. Don't be scared. Answer the call today.

What Everyone's Problem Is

Ahhhh, it's Spring.... the flowers are blooming, the birds are singing, the sun is shining, and people are still screwed up. We all should hopefully know the overall situation with the human race right now: war, lust, lies, wasteful money, poverty, the fame game, government corruption, and sinful activity of the like. It's so tempting to think, "If only there were love... If only there were peace... If only Nickelback would quit making music..."

So what's wrong with thinking that? First of all, we oftentimes long for "good" in the world but have our own personalized version of what that should look like floating around in our head. Our own thoughts can be very misleading because things like feelings, selfishness, desires, and opinions get in the way. Our idea of a better world is usually clouded by the idea that whatever the world should be should benefit us.

Admit it. You do that. Hey, I do that! Who doesn't? Anyway, what's the real issue with the world? You. Really. Our mistake is pointing our fingers to the world, as if we've got nothing to be blamed for. And the convenience of being alive is that it's never too late to start allowing change to take place. In the end, when you're dead and being judged by the hosts of Heaven, they're going to look at you, what you've done, not what you thought of the world.

Anne Frank who, as you hopefully know, was a young Jewish girl who died in a concentration camp (a.k.a. Hell on earth) in the year 1945. Her life was horrible, and she said of the most amazing things ever. One of them being:

"People will always follow a good example; be the one to set a good example, then it won't be long before the others follow... How lovely to think that no one need wait a moment, we can start now, start slowly changing the world! How lovely that everyone, great and small, can make their contribution toward introducing justice straightaway..."

You see, our example is contagious. Also, what's inside our hearts shows in our behavior and everyday choices. That's why if we're joyful and pure on the inside, the world will see that part of you.

The choice is yours. 

How you react to the terrors of planet Earth is really up to you. You can choose not to fall into despair, not to be unkind to others or yourself, not to be a slave, not to become some kind of emotionless and desensitized robot... to turn towards God, the perfecter of beauty... it's all on you. Liberty can be yours, depending on how you translate it.

"For freedom, Christ set us free; so stand firm and do not submit again to the yoke of slavery. For you were called for freedom, brothers. But do not use this freedom as an opportunity for the flesh; rather, serve one another through love." Go do it!

(Galatians 5 verses 1 and 13)

It's like what MJ says, "If you wanna make the world a better place, take a look at yourself and then make a change." Go do it! Nobody's stopping you unless you let them.

Change Changing Things

Man, things are rapidly progressing in my life right now. When I was 16, I thought starting a college class was tough enough. When I was 17 I thought driving was tough enough. When I was 18 (which, I still am) I thought being an official college student was tough enough. I also thought starting a job was tough enough. And now I'm almost 19 and I am about to move out and be on my own in a week.

I dunno how tough that will be, but I know how it feels now.

I've always lived in a big family, was home-schooled, and grew up spending most of my days with my brothers. Now there are 2 new members in our family, one that's 2 years old and one that's 1. I've been gone a whole lot this semester, usually everyday except Sunday. I know that it's hard to say goodbye to my little siblings even though I know I'll be home later. But soon, I'll be away for a long time, and they won't see me coming home in the evenings anymore. I'm used to being away a lot, but not gone.

Oh, I'll visit home on weekends, and be in communication, but still, I need guidance, and what better thing to do than to turn to God in all of this?

It did bring some comfort to know that tears,  homesickness, and "wanting my mommy" were perfectly normal for the first few weeks of moving out, so at least I know that in advance. It's almost scary even, but I do know that it's time for me to leave.

All this change is overwhelming, but it's also exciting, and I can't wait for it to happen. All these emotions are making me a bit crazy, but I know God has been keeping me strong through all of it.

So if you are like me right now and are scared, stressed, worried, excited, happy, and/or sad to be doing something life-changing, I'm with you there. But God understands it all. Don't hesitate to give Him a call. He's all you'll need no matter what happens. :)

In Defense of Christian Music Part 2

Alright, I caused a stir with this post! I got people to react, people to agree with me, people to disagree, and lots of discussion on specific/possible issues. How awesome!

Now, this post is simply to clear up/answer any question that many people have from this. I have noticed some recurring things in response to my post, and I'm going to now state them in a FAQ format!




Q: What do you think about Christian music?

A: Well, like with any genre, it depends on the artist, the song, and whether or not I like what I hear or not!



Q: So, you side with Christian music? Does this mean you are "Pro-Christian Music"?

A: No, I am definitely NOT "Pro-Christian Music", and no I don't necessarily "side" with it, either. In case you missed it, I wrote in one of my first paragraphs that "yeah, I am not too crazy about [Christian music] myself". There is no black and white to this. Next...


Q: Then why are you so defensive of it?

A: Perhaps my post was incorrectly named... What it SHOULD have been called was "In Defense of People Whom I Love Dearly, Do Not Know, and Never Will Know Who Like Christian Music." or "BadCatholic Incorrectly Wrote a Post so Now I'm About to Point Out What's Wrong With It". I was mostly sticking up for those who really do love Christian music. Although I knew most (namely my three best friends) would most likely side with the other guy, this is what I felt in my heart and so I spoke anyway.

 I could stick up for Miley Cyrus, for example, for she is a human being who suffers from fame, but not like what she does or what she sings about. Doesn't mean that because she is overly franchised, talked about, problematic, or cheesy, she isn't as valuable as the rest of us. She's human, humans are sacred, thus I defend her even when other people disagree with her. (Why I made the connection between her and Christian music, I don't really know...)

But I digress.

If I defend something, it's usually because of a deeper reason than "I just like this thing a lot". As long as something hits home, I'm ALL over it.


Q: What is your opinion of BadCatholic now?

A: Still love him. Because we're called to love each other. Especially our enemies... *ahem*


Q: What IS wrong with Christian music?

A: I think people who don't really listen to Christian music tend to stereotype. Or judge it based on the dj's. But a "problem" that is very evident is relevance. It's like we're diluting Jesus or something so He's easier to swallow by making him current:

Chillax, man. Don't worry bout nothing. Just call me up homie and just forget all your probz. Give me your wishlist and it shall all be yours cuz I love to spoil you rotten. Cuz I luvva, dude. Phillipians 4:6


But EVERY music industry does this (indie people have nothing to worry about *Josh Garrells, cough, cough*), so it's not surprising that Christian media would do so. But it's disappointing. And unnecessary. But this is a whole other topic I'd rather not get into (it'll take WAY too long) so I'm going to recommend the book "Jesus Shock" to you instead.


Q: What IS Christian music, then?

A: A genre that wanted to be different from the other music that had crappy messages? Perhaps. Or is it separate because society wanted Christianity to stay out of the mainstream world? Very possible. It is true that music is of God, but because we have original sin, our talents have gone through corruption. That is why there seems to be a split.


Q:  But what IS Christian music?

A: Ask God.


Q: What IS music?

A: Go away.



Q: What IS MUSIC????

A: An art of sound in time that expresses ideas and emotions insignificant forms through the elements of rhythm, melody, harmony, and color. 

Origin: God



Q: Since hearing replies and input from others, have you changed your mind at all?

A: Heck no.



Bye.

In Defense of Christian Music

Man I've been wanting to say this for a LONG time, and there hasn't come a perfect time to unleash my fury than now.... It's been itching, screaming, and clawing it's way out of my heart. A lot of people don't know this, but when I hear this I may look totally normal on the outside, but inside I am all

You guys have no idea

The topic is Christian music. Ah, yes, the musically formulated "Christian" cheese whiz for your ears. The rip-offs of famous hits with "Jesus is Lord" sprinkled throughout. The kind of music that ALWAYS gets played at the emotional parts of movies or TV shows. The thing that Christians and atheists alike love to criticize. Yeah, I'm not too crazy about it myself.

This isn't everyone's favorite topic to pick apart, but tonight I am going to whole-heartedly defend it's cause! A bit of a shocker, considering that I seem to be the type who wouldn't do that. But what I'm about to write about is something I am quite hardcore about. *Lawlz I used the word 'about' three times in that sentence*

Let's start by addressing a very problematic article on the internets:

I know darn well how Marc Barnes (AKA the Bad Catholic) pushes the envelope when blogging... Heck, that's his specialty, if he got paid for doing that he'd be a millionaire. Usually his articles are well-written and, being as brilliant as he is, he generally constructs very solid, well-grounded points throughout. Sometimes I disagree with him, but..... asdfghjklqeixzzcmnbx..... ARGH. I mean, sure he was right about a few things, but the whole core of the article was screwed up and I don't think I've ever disagreed with him 100% before. I'm talking about one of his more recent articles titled, 5 Reasons to Kill Christian Music. *Yeah, you can see where this is going already...*

His #1 reason was "Writing a “Christian” song reduces Christianity to a modifying adjective".

Opinionated, much? The word "Christian" is an adjective... And that'sssssssssssss...... bad? 

That point was lame to begin with. Anyway, moving on.

My mother made an excellent point when she reacted to this page, notably over Marc's second reason to "kill" Christian music. She said that there's always gonna be that woman or man (and you know who I'm talking about) who has a house full of made-in-China Jesus statues everywhere, or cliched inspirational posters, or "Jesus Rox" shirts, etc, and they're living all out for God, but why put that person down? Marc's point is basically the same thing as saying it is better to have a pornographic image on your wall than a cheap plastic Jesus statue because it's "real art", and God made "real art". Again, another lamazoid and surprisingly not-well-thought-out conclusion.  

I remember a friend of mine poking fun at the over-joyous-and-fake-laughs-over-every-caller's-comments DJ on KLove, how annoying it was that they were pushing the whole "positivity and smiles all around" message. Well, what if, just imagine with me for a minute, that that message actually means something to someone? And *big shocker* it DOES. Lemme tell you something:

Once there was a little girl whose family was experiencing a nasty divorce. Because of this, the family wasn't going to church at the time. She got made fun of at school. The girl felt so much pain, confusion, and sadness that it was indescribable. Who could she turn to? What was the only encouraging thing she had in her time of suffering? Christian radio. That was the closest thing to church she could get. She would listen to that, listen to the messages, and pray with it...

While I have friends who roll their eyes when that Casting Crowns song comes on the radio, I have other friends who sing it worshipfully, remembering and thanking God for the moment He spoke to them through the music. Ok, maybe I am more likely to listen to a "secular" radio station over a "Christian" one, but I can't help think of what good it has done to people. I have had a friend who was very close to my heart whose life was turned around just because she decided to listen to Christian music one day. Her views had changed, everything had, and she was became serious about her faith. All because she had tuned into Spirit. God spoke that day, and it was in a way that she could hear and understand.

The Catholic church also teaches that even if the motives are wrong, the pith, the core, is valid even so. For example, if a priest was secretly living a totally messed up life, that doesn't mean that the root of the mass he is leading was dug up. The Eucharist, the sacraments, the blessings, were all still holy. The same can be said about Christian music. 

Besides that, everyone's walk with Christ is completely different from each other. Different things matter to different people. For guys like Marc Barnes, Christian music simply isn't going to cut it, but for others, like my good friend, Christian music is vital. And that is perfectly alright whether you agree with it or not. It'd be equally wrong if a Christian music fan said that people like Marc Barnes should "kill" their Mumford and Sons because it isn't explicitly Christian. See? 

Still aren't convinced? Here's SCRIPTURE for you that makes the EXACT SAME POINT...

Philippians 1:18:

New International Version (©2011)

But what does it matter? The important thing is that in every way, whether from false motives or true, Christ is preached. And because of this I rejoice. Yes, and I will continue to rejoice...

In yo FACE, suckahs.

If Christ is being preached, that's all that matters, in every way. 

YES Christian music is cheesy! YES a lot of Christian artists are simply in it for the money! I completely agree with that, BUT THE GOSPEL MESSAGES AND PRAISES ARE STILL VALID. Before you make fun of the fakey-ness of it and use it as the scapegoat, or rather, the excuse, to listen to Ozzy, stop and think for a second. Look at the whole picture, not just your opinionated one. Those are real people, telling real messages, whether they're actually in it for the message or not. There is a fine line between pointing something out and being flat out judgmental. Sometimes our own opinions can seem like the strongest truth in us, but no matter how you slice it, truth is... truth! Thus let's not say we "should stop making Christian music", and let's certainly not kill it. OK? Game over. 

STILL don't agree? 

Fine then.

Pinkie?

God bless you all.

PS: All the stories about those people that I talked about are 100% real. I just didn't include all their names so that I may respect their privacy. 

The Illuminati in mass media and my Catholic two cents on the matter

I know, I haven't finished my story and it's been weeks since I've written anything, but please allow me to finish things in my own time and order! And I apologize.... happy?

OK OK, enough of the fluff. Let's get on with it, shall we?

So as most everybody knows conspiracy theories and crazy assumptions about our everyday media have been thriving in Internet conversation. Talk about the Illuminati and dark forces behind the latest music video aren't only contained in small Internet threads or major blogs such as the Vigilant Citizen, no, it is even talked about on news networks, but often in a negative or downgrading sort of way. Discussion of Beyonce's performance during the halftime 2013 Super Bowl, for example, was especially hot. It has drawn more, how you say, awareness on the subject of conspiracies. Still, the possibility of such things is something many blow off or think is a bunch of bologna. 

But what exactly is everyone talking about? For those of you who don't know, I'll lightly inform you. 

So basically some people have made claims that there very specific things that are almost always present in your favorite tv show, movie, music video, advertisement, tech toy, snack, or song; things that are laced with evil and demonic intentions. 

What these theorists have seen are these specific objects (or symbols) are repeated EVERY-frickin-WHERE in media and we never notice them. I'll put a few picture links to show examples. Some of these objects include:

- A triangle or a pyramid [1, 2, 3, 4...]

- Hexagon (or beehive) pattern

- Blood

- Black and white tiled floors [1, 2...]

- Butterflies or bees [1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6...]

- Covering up (or emphasizing) one eye [1, 2, 3, 4, 5...]

- Devil horns [1, 2...] 

- Some type of metamorphosis 

- Skulls

- Human advancement/robotizing

Just to name a few...

There is far more detail, symbolism, and explanation behind all this, and there is no way to sum it all up, and it's not worth it either. I'll work with what I got...

Anyway, these things are supposedly symbols that could represent slavery, mind control, freemasonry, demonic possession, a culture of death, the antichrist, Satan worship, war, and things of the like. Many ask how does this affect anything? Apparently these symbols are supposed to affect our subconscious or us in a spiritual way. And a WHOLE LOT of work and research has been put into this to back it up. 

Blah blah blah, so just how legit is this stuff? Is it real? Do these things really happen?

I believe it. 

I don't think you will turn into some mindless drone after watching a Disney movie or anything, and I also don't think there is any need to panic or shove this stuff down people's throats. I also think that there is some stuff in these theories that is crap, but if you look at how fame has changed individuals in scary ways you have to eventually stop and wonder what exactly is going on. 

Another good question is WHY? Why are these things so heavily laced in everyday things? As far as human beings go my answer is money and power. Simple. With money and power, you can do almost anything. Or, so people think....

Every legend must eventually die. And when someone mega rich dies, they can't take their money with them. People like Adolf Hitler lose all their power as soon as they go to the grave. It's an obsession with gaining the world and losing as much of the soul as possible in order to make that happen. And as for us innocent everyday human beings who get our daily dose of mass produced media, well, we buy this stuff. Sin sells, and is made again and again and again and again. See? Money money money. That's why God told us to guard our hearts because sometimes we really DON'T know what we're letting into our hearts and minds.

As far as spiritual forces go, the Devil is always out to corrupt the church and the truth in any way that he can. Music, talents, stories, imagination, were all built by God, and the Devil tries to claim those things by putting sin in the picture. But just because Jay-Z sung about Satan in a song doesn't mean that Satan now has claims to music. It's quite hilarious actually how lame Satan's attempts are at dominating things. 

Some people claim that these symbols are prophetic and lead to evidence of a very scary future. Truth is we humans really don't know what the future holds. One thing we Christians do know is that Jesus will come again and set everything right. It WILL be a great and terrible day, but we really don't know when exactly that will be or what it will look like. Besides that, if these symbols really are demonic, why should we trust them? Isn't Satan a LIAR? 

As for us Christians searching and warning others about this symbolism, well, I think God wants every Christian to be on the lookout for His signs and wonders, not the Devil's. It's ok to be aware of it, I think, but to purposefully dig them up and spend all our time and labor on it isn't our calling. One thing I've personally discovered is that God is also very evident is mass media too! He CAN speak through everyday things! Messages of love, kindness, gentleness, goodness, faithfulness, and self control can be seen everywhere! It's like what 80's Christian rock band Petra said in Judas' Kiss (ironically and hilariously) in a subliminal back masking message.

Also as a catholic, I know that the church is, like mass media, heavily composed of symbols with various meanings. That's why many theorists attack the church as well. But unlike mass media the church's symbols all contain messages of love that all point towards the depth and sacrifice of Jesus Christ, the Kingship of God, and the influence of the Holy Spirit. It makes sense to me that Satan would try to mirror that in an evil way. 

So what do you do now? Start looking and searching for God with all your heart, mind, soul, and strength! Be careful what you do, act out of love, and ask God to make you clean from all your sins. He will! Believe it, bro. :)

Within Chaos - Chapter 2

After what felt like hours, the ongoing shouts finally seemed to fade away. Janet stood up, brushed herself off, and figured, there was nothing else to do around here.

"May as well sleep," she said as she headed for the bedroom. "I could just sleep away my problems. I can ignore them... They'll just drift away... "

She saw her nightstand clock. It was 10 PM.

"Perfect timing," she said. As she plopped down on the bed, the picture of her and her boyfriend fell off the nightstand and crashed onto the floor.

"No!" she cried, picking up the pieces. Explosive feelings flowed through a short rage as the glass cut her hands. She went over to the trash can and dropped the tear and blood covered shards into it.

"How could he...? I mean, he used me.... Why.... how...." She then gathered the remaining parts of the broken frame, tossed it, and then took the crumpled up photograph. It had already been torn up multiple times before, with only a few small pieces of tape holding it together.

"What a jerk," Janet said, wiping her eyes. "Why do I even miss him?" She sighed, tore up the photo for the final time and let the pieces flip and float down into the trash can. Relief showered her like gust of wind. Janet was done crying over him. After covering her hands with a few Band-Aids, it was finally time for a snooze. Janet lay down and immediately fell into a deep sleep.



----



Janet rolled over and glanced at the clock. 11 PM.

"Hmm," she thought, "I've only been asleep for an hour." She felt refreshed but gross, and wondered why her head hurt. She picked up her phone and checked the calendar. Two days had passed.

"I've overslept!" she yelled, slapping her forehead. She leaped out of bed and hurried into the shower. Violently, she scrubbed herself so hard that her pouf left scratches all over her body. She dumped more soap on, scrubbing, scrubbing, scratching... For some reason, her efforts to become clean did not make her feel clean. Angry, she reached for the soap and shook the bottle hard, only to find that all of the soap was gone.

"All gone?" Janet said. "This bottle is brand new..."

The water was off and she was drying herself. She wrapped the towel around her body and walked into her room to get clothes on, but she had no clean clothes in her dresser.

Janet fell to the floor. "I am thirsty... I am hungry... My life is out of control... Who am I??" A pool of teardrops collected on the floor.

Eeeeeeeee buzz buzz buzz eeeeeeeeeeee......

A subtle whine of a fly began to be noticeable to Janet. She glanced up, but she couldn't see the fly, perhaps because her vision was cloudy. She let her head back down. The fly began to circle her head, and the volume of the whine increased.

Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee...... Buzzzzzzzz......

...it became louder....

BUZZBUZZBUZZBUZZEEEEEEEBUZZBUZZEEEEE......

...and louder...

BUUUUUUUUUUZZZ EEEEEEEEEEEEEEE......

...AND LOUDER.... The squeal was piercing her eardrums...

"SHUT UP!!!!!" Janet screamed.

She panted. The whine had stopped, but the fly was still there. This time, Janet could see it, just sitting there on the floor, facing her. It was an unusually large fly, and Janet said to it, "I have never seen a fly quite like you before!"

The fly nodded, and in a smooth voice it said, "I know."

Janet gasped. Did the fly just... speak? 

Within Chaos - Chapter 1

Janet made a cup of decaf and carefully balanced it atop of a stack of books that was lying on her coffee table. She stepped over a pile of dirty laundry that was sitting between the coffee table and her couch, shoved stacks of papers over to other side of the couch, and sat down. She then tilted her head back and tried to relax. It was hard to do that with all her things just laying around.

"I should clean up one of these days," Janet said. She had been telling herself that ever since she moved out of her parents' household seven years ago. This messy apartment has been her home ever since, and lately she's been quite lonely. Oh, Janet had friends, and she certainly had the magnetic personality that drew all kinds of people to her. To everyone who had the pleasure of making her acquaintance, she appeared to be bold and fiery, with her intense red hair and bright smile. Her clothes were unusual but suited her well, and many men found her sweetness and unique characteristics refreshing.  She was truly a genuine young woman; literally unlike any other.

But her apartment... that dreaded, dusty old apartment...

Janet sipped her coffee and grimaced. That Half and Half was older than she thought. She arose and sighed, and hobbled over to the kitchen where she dumped the liquid into the overflowing sink. She opened her cupboard and saw that there were no clean glasses left, so she drank water straight from the faucet, holding her long hair up so that it wouldn't touch the grey dishwater below. 

Janet sat back down on the couch, this time with a magazine that was three years old. She didn't read the articles, didn't pay attention to what the words meant, didn't look at the pictures, she just stared blankly at it. After a while, she shut the magazine and tried to lie down. Those papers on the other side of the couch were in the way. Frustrated, she kicked the pile hard and the papers scattered all over the place. Suddenly, a loud series of knocks sounded from the door: 

BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!

Startled, Janet fell off the couch and hit the floor. The tall mound of laundry laying there made her back hurt from the impact. She whined in pain.

BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!

"Janet! Janet! Are you in there? Janet?"

Janet continued to lay there, motionless. This peculiar noise frightened her greatly, and she never answered the door when this particular stranger came by. To Janet the voice was threatening and dark, and she couldn't bear it.

"Janet! Let me in! JANET!"

BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!

Janet hid under the heap of dirty clothes and buried her head into a torn up hoodie. 

"LET ME IN!!!"

"Never," she whispered. 

--------------------------------------------------------------------

I AM GOOD I AM GREAT I AM WONDERFUL

I AM HORRIBLES.

I haven't made a blog post in like, three years.

I am also in an exaggerated mood right now.

So hey guys. I has a job, that keeps me pretty dang busy, and soon school is also going to start, AND I am going to move in a couple of months. Day-yang. Transcending into being all-grown-up is kind of tricky! But hey.....

I am a grown-up now!!!

Actually no I'm not.

I'm still a kid.

Especially compared to older wiser people like my awesome parents and grandparents. They've lived life longer and have experienced and grown far more than I have. Sometimes (like all we kiddos tend to do) we just don't wanna listen to our day-yang elders. My piece of advice? Listen to them, or you'll die. OK, maybe not, but most likely they've got the power of guidance in your life, if you'd let them.

Anyway, a lot of things that I am going to need to start taking way more seriously is budgeting and managing money. This is the sort of thing every teen (well, me at least) would roll eyes over and kinda ignore. Now that money is starting to actually matter to me (like getting a car, gas, rent, utilities, insurance, groceries, tithing, tuition, textbooks, setting a good foundation for the future, etc etc etc), I've been learning to buy only what I need at the store and then splurge....... very, very, VERY sparingly.

I'm trying to store up a whole buncha money over a long period of time. This is a slow but surefire way of building wealth. My ultimate goal is not to be wealthy, but to have a solid financial foundation for the future, that being the possibility of marriage, kids, and (what's guaranteed) emergencies. Yup, I've become quite the goal-setter and dreamer lately.

Besides that, I've also been learning to be more under control, positive, and determined as life rapidly progresses. All of this hasn't been possible without the help and guidance of my Father, God. So thanks to Him for EVERYTHING! :)

That's basically it.

Yeah, it's good news for ME at least.

Thanks for reading!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bye, DUDEZ.